THE REDNECK FIRE ALARM

The REDNECK FIRE ALARM

Available at most local grocery stores and Wal-Mart.

Now that’s funny…I don’t care who you are.

Gotta love those Rednecks!

Gotta love those Rednecks! REDNECK YARD SWING “““““““““““““““““““““““““““““““““““` Redneck Cooler ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ How do you know when you’re staying in a Redneck motel? When you call the front desk and say, I gotta leak in my sink, and the clerk replies, ‘Go ahead’. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Redneck Cellar ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Redneck Garden ~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Did you hear that they have raised the minimum drinking age for Rednecks to 32? It seems they want to keep alcohol out of the high schools. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Redneck Limo ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Two reasons why it’s so hard to solve a Redneck murder: 1) The DNA is all the same 2) There are no dental records ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Redneck Mailbox ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Who invented the toothbrush ? A Redneck. (If it had been invented by anyone else, it would have been called a teethbrush.) ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ A State Trooper pulls over a pickup on Highway 16 and says to the driver, ‘Got any I.D. ?’. and the driver replies ‘Bout wut?’ ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Redneck Time Out ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Did you hear about the $3 million Redneck Lottery ? The winner gets $3.00 a year for a million years. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Redneck Weenie Roast ~~~ ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ A new Redneck law was just recently passed . When a couple gets divorced, they are STILL cousins. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Redneck Wheelchair ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Did you hear that the Redneck governor’s mansion burned down ? ‘Yep. Prit’near took out the whole trailer park. The library was a total loss too. Both books went poof . . . up in flames and the governor hadn’t even finished coloring one of them.’