A Tribute to Jefferson Airplane

THE REDNECK FIRE ALARM

The REDNECK FIRE ALARM

Available at most local grocery stores and Wal-Mart.

Now that’s funny…I don’t care who you are.

Gotta love those Rednecks!

Gotta love those Rednecks! REDNECK YARD SWING “““““““““““““““““““““““““““““““““““` Redneck Cooler ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ How do you know when you’re staying in a Redneck motel? When you call the front desk and say, I gotta leak in my sink, and the clerk replies, ‘Go ahead’. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Redneck Cellar ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Redneck Garden ~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Did you hear that they have raised the minimum drinking age for Rednecks to 32? It seems they want to keep alcohol out of the high schools. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Redneck Limo ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Two reasons why it’s so hard to solve a Redneck murder: 1) The DNA is all the same 2) There are no dental records ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Redneck Mailbox ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Who invented the toothbrush ? A Redneck. (If it had been invented by anyone else, it would have been called a teethbrush.) ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ A State Trooper pulls over a pickup on Highway 16 and says to the driver, ‘Got any I.D. ?’. and the driver replies ‘Bout wut?’ ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Redneck Time Out ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Did you hear about the $3 million Redneck Lottery ? The winner gets $3.00 a year for a million years. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Redneck Weenie Roast ~~~ ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ A new Redneck law was just recently passed . When a couple gets divorced, they are STILL cousins. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Redneck Wheelchair ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Did you hear that the Redneck governor’s mansion burned down ? ‘Yep. Prit’near took out the whole trailer park. The library was a total loss too. Both books went poof . . . up in flames and the governor hadn’t even finished coloring one of them.’

California License Plate

Recently, a Beverly Hills attorney submitted a request to the California Department of Motor Vehicles for a Personalized License Plate.  His request was rejected.  The reason for the objection was that the letters requested were obscene.  The attorney removed one space from the letters and resubmitted the request.  This time it was approved.  This is the approved version of the license plate.

Breaking News – Celebrity Swine Flu Fatality

Breaking News – Celebrity Swine Flu Fatality

And we all know who gave it to him…

Failures